Bob Had Bitch Tits

The worst day ever

After recently taking on 21 additional hours a week, I thought that my life was finally looking up and everything was going to be okay.

Alas, nothing can ever be remotely decent in my life. I lost a job I hadn’t even had the chance to start and have officially left the Houstonian for good.

I have come to the conclusion that I cannot continue to give endlessly only to be screwed over again and…

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Desperation 2: The Beggening

Desperation 2: The Beggening

I have reached an all new level of desperate over this summer. Despite having worked almost every single day I am no further out of the monetary hole than I was before. In fact I am pretty sure that I am poorer now than when school ended.

So in a moment, or rather a few months, of weakness I have decided to create a GoFundMe page.

GoFundMe in all honesty is the agoraphobics version of…

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Search Histories are for dummies

Search Histories are for dummies

The internet has grown into an amazing, catfishing, shopping and porn-hopping world.

Since the birth of the web, hundreds of ways to hide every terrible and disgusting thing you are even remotely curious about have been invented.

The thing is that apparently only three percent of the Internet knows how to activate anything even remotely close to an Incognito window.

That being said, if you aren’t…

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The Wonderful Doctor of Oz

The Wonderful Doctor of Oz

Courtesy fo CNN

Courtesy fo CNN

Since the times of the Old West, snake oil salesmen have plagued America with promises of cure-alls and magic potions with exaggerated prices.

They traveled the land feeding off of desperation and hope, fooling anyone they could into buying their remedies. Many times this led to their vicious murder at the hands of an angry crowd, but when it didn’t it led to a fortune earned with…

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Is the World Cup worth the protests?

Is the World Cup worth the protests?

The obsession has only reached its halfway point, yet everyone from grandmas to Google lose their minds over the 2014 World Cup.
Unfortunately, if you are one of the 12 people who do not give a flying shit about soccer, you are more than likely going to be forced to endure fans more insane than Gary Busey.
The World Cup has been an escalator for insanity since the beginning of time. The event has…

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The Unexplained

Though I live as an avid atheist I have always found a form of solace in the idea of the unexplained. Since before I can remember I have been fascinated by mysteries of all kinds. Whether they be disappearances, deaths, eerie activity or supposed haunting, the things that supposedly go beyond the human realm of comprehension fuel my desire to understand more.

Mysteries go beyond just what some…

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Working hard for the summer

Working hard for the summer

It is once again that special time of year. No, not graduation time, no one cares about that. It is time for all of the summer hires to get off their couch encrusted asses and remember what it feels like to deal with morons for a living.

If you are lucky like, I once was, you may be able to score a desk job with your mom. If you aren’t so fortunate than you get to re-familiarize yourself with…

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I have spent five years collecting bottle caps and at the beginning of the summer I decided that I was going to finally make something out of my nearly thousand caps. I have spent the past few weeks emailing breweries from around the world, requesting cap donations so that I could represent as many brews as possible.

With the help of my dad, I have designed the table and drawn a building plan for it as well. The table top is planned to be .5″ thick and 21″x 21″ in dimensions. The base will be topped with .5″ thick and .5″ tall pieces of wood to form a dam around the sides of the table. Once in place the edges will be used to hold back the gloss resin from spilling when it is poured over the place and glued caps. This is intended to create the illusion of a glass topped table.

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I want to thank the following breweries and their personnel for their willingness to participate and help me with my project.

Special thanks to:

Perennial Beer

Southern Tier Brewing Company

Deschutes Brewery

Surly Brewery


Russian River Brewing Company

Green Flash Brewing

Monday Night Brewing

Odell Brewing Company

Black Sheep Brewing Company

New Belgium Brewing

Dogfish Head Brewing Company

Duclaw Brewery

Flying Dog Brewery

Ninkasi Brewing Company

Bear Republic Brewing Company

Building a beer cap table I have spent five years collecting bottle caps and at the beginning of the summer I decided that I was going to finally make something out of my nearly thousand caps.

Revisiting the Chromebook

Like with all things the honeymoon phase of computer ownership must eventually come to an end. When it comes to the relationship I have with my Chromebook, I can guarantee that the honeymoon is over.

At first just having a means of accessing the internet was enough for me, but now that I have truly gotten to know the ins and outs of my computer, I have to say that it is awful.

It took me months…

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The Tarantino/Rodriguez Universe: Explained

The Tarantino/Rodriguez Universe: Explained

Can we take a moment to recognize how amazingly intricate the Tarantino/ Rodriguez universe is? That’s right. You probably have heard of the Tarantino universe in which all of his films take place, but did you know that Robert Rodriguez’s films also exist in that universe?

To truly appreciate and understand the complexities of this realm, you must first understand the universe as if it were two…

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The truck that meowed

The truck that meowed

Today, my neighborhood banded together to find and extract the source of a mysterious meowing that was being emitted from a truck. The truck, belonging to my mom’s neighbors began meowing a couple days ago before it was driven up to Houston. Upon arrival in Houston a kitten jumped out and hightailed it, effectively escaping the driver. The meowing, however, continued and was heard by others…

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Fixing my literally broken heart

Fixing my literally broken heart

When I was in the ninth grade I began having what I call ‘rolling blackouts’. These blackouts are a form of seizure called a petit mal seizure. They are a moment where the wiring in my brain decides that it doesn’t feel like doing its job and I will blackout, losing all of my sight and hearing. These moments would come about at any point in time, no matter what I was doing. I have discussed this…

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A Public Proposal

Execution of violent criminals and the incidentally innocent has become one of Texas’ favorite pastimes over the years.

Despite protests and studies declaring the process of ending lives to be inhumane, the state continues to flip off activists and weaker states, such as New York, which hasn’t executed a prisoner since 1963, alike.

The gradual evolution of state mandated executions in Texas has…

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SHSU to become reality soon

Students and faculty members at Sam Houston State University expect to open a food pantry within the coming semester after years of questioning whether or not it could be done.

Three years ago, a group of SHSUcommunity members devised the idea to create a food pantry for students who need a little extra help. Despite having formed both a committee and advising board in place, the pantry failed to…

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